Oh man, life is just so exciting!  *insert happy grin/jumping up and down/gigling*  The past week has been just. plain. fun!!!  My first day at work last Thursday was totally awesome.  My boss is awesome, the other coworker is awesome, the customers are awesome, and the coffee is awesome. 'Nuff said?  Yup, I'm gonna love it.  So blessed. <3

Then, I officially started my college classes (through CollegePlus) yesterday!!  I spent the day at Dunn Bros studying/getting organized, and may or may not have consumed three large coffees. :P  Exploring CollegePlus has been so exciting, and I've already "met" a bunch of awesome people!  I can't wait to have my first call with my coach, I already know I'm gonna love her.

So, that's a min-update for you.  I worked 8 hours today and I now have studying to do, so this barista is checking out!  Talk later!

Awesome + Awkward II

DISCLAIMER: This was written in a coffee-less state, and also in a hurry, so it probably contains lots of gramatic-al and sentence-al and sense-ical errors.  But I really do not care, because I only have so much time for blogging, so this is just whatcha get.  My non-perfect writing.  You have been warned.

Awesome:

~Friends who know exactly the right time to send a text and let you know they are praying for you and hope you are having a great day.  And it cheers you up so much.
~ Having a family who is so supportive and encouraging to you in your new ventures.
~Working your first day, and your dad stops in in the morning to drop off your lunch, which you forgot, and he takes out his phone and takes a picture.  His little girl all grown up!  ;-)
~Also on your first day at work, later in the day, your Mom and brothers stopping by! You're  washing dishes in the kitchen, look up, and there they are peeking around the corner, taking pictures. =)
~Your boss starting out your first day at work by making you a mocha.  Yes, please, and thank you very much.  You may have found your calling in life {drinking mochas}.
~How understanding and helpful your boss/coworkers are to the newbie!
~Tear-jerking testimonies at church.  Testimonies of God's love and grace, it's so awesome.
~Knowing that God has a plan for your life, so you don't need to stress about things, just enjoy the ride.
~Friends who bring you chocolate and coffee.  Those are the best kind of friends.  Ever.
~Going skiing for the first time!
~Riding up the chairlift with an 8 year old boy....  you strike up a conversation with him, asking him how long he has been snowboarding, etc., etc.  As you near the end, he looks at you and says, "You know, I'm really glad I came on this chairlift with you, I think I had a lot more fun than I would have on a different one!"  Melt your heart.  It was so cute!
~Snuggling babies. <3
~The beautiful weather!  Wearing capris, t-shirts, and flip flops!  It's like 40 degrees, people! :P
~Your sweet little brother who always asks you how your day went.  He's so thoughtful.
~Your coworker telling you she really enjoys working with you.  Makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside.The feeling is mutual!  She's so sweet.
~Opportunities to share Jesus with the lost!
~Friends who you can be your weird self around.
~Getting to spend an afternoon with your bestie, who lives in Colorado right now.
~Skiing with five guys and pretty much feeling like a doted-over little sister the whole day.  Every time you crashed, one or two of them was there to help you get back on your feet and on your skis and going...you feel totally spoiled...it is kinda awesome though. =)
~The lyrics of this song: "I wanna live like there's no tomorrow, love like I'm on borrowed time, it's good to be alive."  So inspiring, and so true!
~Getting to spend the weekend with your wonderful Grandma for her birthday.  She is the sweetest person in the world, and you love her so much.
~Having a productive day...getting up early, having devos, getting your chores done, going to work and working for 8 hours, coming home and jogging a mile, then getting a lesson done for your class, and...writing a blog post or two.  ;)

Awkward:

~The things auto correct does to your texts.  And then you correct auto correct, and auto correct corrects you, and you correct auto correct, and auto correct corrects you.  Repeat three times.  Pull hair out.

~Pulling up to a red light, rolling down window to wipe off rear view mirror. Try to close window. Window won't close. This is normal in your car. Light turns green. You pull on window, push button, and creep through the intersection, making faces as everyone watches.
~The big post-it-note on your car window that says "LIGHTS OFF".  After leaving them on for the 50th time, it was time for drastic measures.

~Sitting at the gas station in Dassel with your hood popped (left your lights on again), realizing what a reputation you and your car are making in your small town.  *disappears*

~Running into the bank three minutes before it closes. You fill out your deposit slip for $70, and then count out $90 to the bank lady.  She looks at you.  "Did you want to deposit $70 or $90"?  You feel  ridiculous and begin babbling about it being a long week and no sleep and you don't have coffee and nonesense while you fix your slip.  I think the people in the bank are getting used to me though, I do something to embarrass myself every time I set foot in there.  

~Seeing a mouse and screaming so loud. So. Loud.

~Texting people in the middle of the night. It gets interesting. And awkward when you are so tired that you can't think straight and say stupid things.  Then going back and reading it in the morning.  *facepalm*
~When the shower malfunctions and gets stuck on, blasting COLD water.  At your Grandma's house. 

~Getting up from your chair in a restaurant and trying to push it in, only to realize it's bolted to the floor.  *Did anyone see that? See what?  Was that me?!*
~Shopping in Walmart, going to check out, and a helpful worker tells you to go to aisle 8.  You smile, say thanks, and walk over to line 7.  Then you look up, see what line you're in, and just kind of crawl over to line 8.  Yes, I feel retarded, why did you ask?
~Writing out a check at the grocery store while a friend you're hanging out with for the day is watching.  The total is fifteen something.  You write it out carefully.  "F-i-f-e-t-e-en."  You look at it.  It just doesn't look right.  You look at your friend and he's just silently laughing.  Did I really just do that?  I know how to spell, I really do.  And I've never spelled fifteen "fifeteen" before.  Of course, said friend will never let you forget it.  '_'
~The fact that while writing the above sentence, you wrote "It just doesn't look write."  Oh my word.  I need more coffee.  It all boils down to coffee, people.  Pretty much 99% of these awkwards happened when I didn't have coffee.
~Sending kissy faces to guy friends.  Those emojis, they just always get in the way of each other.  And make life very awkward for me.
~Stopping to give a tract and some money to a homeless man.   You pull up next to the curb, hand it to him, he says thank you, and you're all like "Yep, thank you!" And he's like "you're welcome!"  And you drive away and look at your brother and am like, "Did I really just thank a homeless man for me giving him money....?" :P  Feeling very blonde.  You don't always think on your feet very well.  Or off them, for that matter.  Anyways.
~Sneaking coffee into the library.  Your mom, skilled coffee smuggler, says, "Just don't make eye contact with the librarian!"  Your mom does it very gracefully.  You, on the other hand, am just the picture of awkward.  *Walks into library.*  *Holds purse in front of coffee*  *Thinks it looks a bit suspicious* (IT DOES).  *Holds it normally* *Face burns* *Stares anywhere but at the librarian* *Tries to act normal* *Fails* *Studies the ceiling* *Tries not to walk into anything* *Sneaks a guilty look at the librarian* *Pretends you didn't see her* *Wonders why this is so difficult*
~Sitting in said library, head phones on, studying and listening to KLove.  A favorite song comes on and you are unconsciously movin' to the music....only to look up and see an old lady walking slowly past, just looking at you. *shrinks away*
~Leaving your piano student's house.  Student: "Have a good drive!"  You: "Thanks!  You too!"  You: walks out front door, realizes what just came out of your mouth (other than the foot you just spit up), and *facepalms*.  "You too."  Gets me every time. WELL WHENEVER YOU DRIVE SOMEWHERE, I HOPE IT'S GOOD.  '_'
~Working in the coffee shop and asking a customer, "Would you like some soup with your crackers?"  Pauses and thinks.  Then, "What I'm trying to say is, would you like any crackers with your soup?"
~Making some shots of espresso, and you kind of forget to hold the little espresso cups underneath.  Oh yeah, forgot that...running espresso down the drain really isn't gonna help anyone is it?  Grateful for a very understanding customer who made me feel so much better when she said "We're all new at something every day!" Thank you, because I feel very new right now!
~Eating crunchy food while you're on the phone.  "Sorry CRUNCH if CRUNCH I'm CRUNCHING in your earCRUNCH."
~A sweet lady coming into the coffee shop and telling you, "You look just like your mom!"  You: "Aww, thank you!" You, to yourself: "I don't even know who you are...?!?!"  But it was still sweet. :)
~Going out to dinner at Olive Garden after skiing with five guys all day, and not realizing that was a HOT pepper that you just ate WHOLE until after the fact. You sit there and guzzle water and stuff bread in your mouth while the guys laugh at you, feel bad for you, and make suggestions to you.  "Really *SNIFF* I'm fine, you guys *WIPES EYES* just give me a minute *SNIFFFFF* I'll be ok *STIFLES A HOWL* that's just really hot.... *AND I FEEL LIKE I'M DYING*"

~The fact that I have so many more awkwards.  But, I gotta go be productive, so, later ya'll!

College, Coffee, and Crazy

Well hello there!  It's me again, I'm back!  And I don't even know where to start, cuz it's been a while since we've talked, huh?!  Yeah just like, umm, over a month.  I *facecpalm* whenever I think about saying I'd try and post every week.  Haha...haha...haha.  

Wellp, I'll just sum up a few of the important events in my life lately: I got a job, I'm starting college, and I quit coffee.

Did you pass out?  

OK, if y'all are revived now, I'll elaborate!  

So yeah, lots of busy-ness and changes lately!  I've been praying about what's next in life for me.  I've dabbled in a few different ideas but wasn't really excited about anything.  Mom was asking me "what is it you love to do?"  Since I was little, I've always wanted to be a midwife.  I looked into doula training, but it just didn't seem the right fit for this time in my life.  Mom asked me if I wanted to pursue music more, and suggested talking to my piano teacher.  I sent her a text, and when she texted back and said she'd highly recommend getting a degree in music, I just knew it was what I was supposed to do!  I got excited and had a peace about it right away, and started looking at different college options.  I'm determined to pay my way through or bust, so saving money was definitely high priority!  So anyways, after a lot of help from people, phone calls, and research....I'm starting online classes through CollegePlus this next Monday!  I'll be taking 29 credits of generals through them, and they estimated it to take 6 months.  I'm gonna try and get it done sooner than that, but I don't know how possible that is!  But I should get them all finished up by September, Lord willing, and then I'll be going to Crown College to pursue my music degree!  I'll be commuting every day, because staying on campus is expennnnnsive.  So yes, it's nose to the grindstone, I've got five hours of studying to do every day.  And I'm excited!  Ask me again when I'm doing algebra and chemistry.  '_'

And a job.  Obviously a big part of starting college was making more money, and I was blessed with getting more piano students.  Then, while I was hanging out working on college stuff at a coffee shop, the owner came up and asked me if I needed any part time work!  He gave me a job application, and I filled it out and brought it in the next day.  To make the story short, I'm starting my job as a barista tomorrow morning at Papa D's in Dassel!  I'm super, super excited!  I mean, coffee lover's dream job, right?!  Which reminds me...

I quite coffee.  Yup, I really did.  I decided one day that I really need to learn to survive without it, so I quit, cold turkey.  In fact, I actually drank water instead.  The self control, I'm tellin' you!  Pretty amazing, if I don't say so myself!  So yeah, it lasted for 11 hours.  I quit coffee for 11 hours.  And then decided that life is too short to be tired, crabby, and coffee deprived, and I welcomed coffee back into my life with open arms.  <3  Haha!  That's the slightly dramatized version... :P

For other news?  Ummm life is kinda pretty much crazy.  But I've realized lately, I thrive on crazy.  I love being busy, always having places to go and people to see.  There is still those times of quiet though, reading scriptures, writing in my journal, and realizing how incredibly blessed I am.  I wouldn't trade anything in my life for anything else.  Even the tough stuff, it's all blessings in disguise.  God is so abundantly good to me.  

I have an Awkward + Awesome post coming up.  The amount of awkwards in my life lately....it's awkward. =P  Meanwhile, here's some pictures from the last month!

Me and my besties at Rachel's (far left) bridal shower!  

This is my mom's "we have coffee and chocolate in the library and we shouldn't!" face.  :P

This is me drinking coffee after my 11-hour fast.  #pureblissandhappiness

The sunrise was coming through the foggy window.  <3

Oh, y'know, just out for a jog in the freezing weather.  =]

Got to spend an afternoon with my big bro, Brandon.  He took me to the Porsche dealership where he works - it was so awesome!!!

Hanging out with Bran, his girlfriend Sam, and a friend of theirs.  The guys were not being photogenic.  

He took me for a ride in his new wheels!

A friend sent this to me.  I have a feeling this will be me in a few days.  :P

This is my awkward happy face after being hired at Papa D's!

Hanging out with my bestie friend forever!  So good to see you again, Serena!!  I miss her like crazy!

We are weird sometimes.

Solving the world's problems over Caribou coffee.

Leave me in a house with paint for the afternoon, and there may be more paint on me than the walls by sundown.  Yes, somehow I dumped paint down my leg.  I even had white freckles!  

Beautiful scriptures.  <3

The sister-of-the-bride and I at the groom's dinner.

Beautiful sunrise, dirty car window.  

I clearly have my priorities straight here.  I buckled in my thermos of coffee, because it is oh-so-precious.  This is on the way to the wedding.  After playing hockey for a few hours the night before (the most painful and injury-ful game of the season) and going to bed at 1am, I showed up at the church with a thermos in one arm and a large mocha (with an extra shot) in the other. Everyone started laughing when I walked in.  I kind of looked down and was like oh, yeah, this is a lot of coffee, isn't it?!  WELL I'M READY TO TAKE ON THE WORLD!

I went skiing for the first time ever!  All day!  And I went over big jumps!  And box rails!  And I was so proud of myself!  And I feel like a 90 year old lady who got hit by a train now!  I can hardly walk! Yay!  And I'd do it all over again!  Because it was that fun!

This is Me, Joe, and Tim, heading up the lift.

Left to Right: Tim, Jason, Me, Joe, and David.  Jason is a friend of Joe's and David is a friend of Jason's.... this was supposed to be a class reunion for my graduation class, but the only people that made it were Joe, Tim, and I.  Party poopers!  And that's how I ended up to be the only girl, too.  Slightly awkward, but then I kind of felt right at home being I'm an only girl anyways!  We had a blast.  Oh, and this picture?  Umm yeah, they are totally holding me from going down the hill backwards there.  :P

The only picture I have of me skiing.  Don't I look like a pro?  :P  Trust me, I couldn't even get up the bunny hill at the beginning of the day.  Like I crashed when I tried to go up the tow rope.  And my friends died laughing at me.  Thanks, guys.  =}  And I crashed coming down the bunny hill.  And then after three or four times of that, the guys are like "Ok!  Now we go to the big hill!" And I was sure they were trying to murder me.  But by the end of the day, I was getting air on the jumps, and landing them too.  Ok, most of them.  Others, my skis were flying far away, and I was head over heels rolling down the hill.  I even got awarded the best crash of the day by the guy running the ski lift.  :P  Eventually, though, I mastered the big jump!  #feelingaccomplished

Hanging out with my bestie before the wedding!  I'll post more pictures of the wedding later!  

  

And now, friends, it's time for me to hit the hay!  Tomorrow I start my barista journey!  Wish me luck!  Over and out.

Love God, Do Whatever You Want

A friend and I were talking about how to know God's will, and he told me about a quote he'd heard, "Love God, do whatever you want."  I was trying to figure out where it came from, googled it, and found this video.  It is really good!  I think that the phrase "Love God, do whatever you want" can definitely be taken the wrong way...it's easy to zero in on the "do whatever you want" part.  But if you put loving God first, everything else falls into place.  For example, choosing a spouse or dating.  Should I date this person or that person?  Which job offer should I take?  Which college should I go to?  Well, those specifics obviously aren't in the Bible.  God gives us boundaries in His word, but we are free to make our own choices inside those boundaries.  We don't need to agonize over these decisions.  We can do whatever we want to do and know that we are in God's will, if we are loving Him first.  In my life right now, a lot of decisions about the future and what I should be doing with this time are being made.  I know what God's will for me is.  He says it in I Corinthians 7:34: "There is difference also between a wife and a virgin. The unmarried woman careth for the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit: but she that is married careth for the things of the world, how she may please her husband."  Right now, I need to be caring for the things of the Lord.  That could mean a lot of different things!  But I am free to make choices in how I will do that. When I'm loving God and abiding in Him, the path is clear.  It's really all much simpler than I think!  John MacArthur says it the best, though, so do yourself a favor and take three minutes to watch it.  ^^^  Now!  ;-)

Verse for the Day

Revelation 3:11:

"Behold, I come quickly: hold that fast which thou hast, that no man take thy crown."

I'm still alive (barely)

Just popping in to let my whopping 8 followers you all know that I'm still alive!  Granted, I'm barely still alive, but alive nonetheless.  Where do I start?  I thought I knew what busy was, but the word busy has a whole new meaning after the last....I don't know, weeks? Month?  It's seemed like an eternity.  I finally understand the verse about 1,000 years being like a day and a day being like 1,000 years in heaven.  These days, an hour seems like a day and a day seems like an hour.  But somehow, it doesn't feel like heaven.  ANYWAYS.  I'm just rambling and probably not making any sense!  But trust me, if nothing intelligent is coming out of my mouth fingertips, I have good reason.  I'm currently slouching sitting on the couch wishing I had a cup of coffee, but I'm too tired to get up and make one.  This is what you call a crisis, folks.  Last night, I was blessed with 90 minutes (it sounds better than an hour and a half) of sleep, which seemed like 90 seconds.  The night before, I set a sleep record for the month: 6 hours.  The night before that, I didn't sleep at all.  I made coffee every two hours instead.  You should try it!  It's amazing how much you can accomplish when you don't sleep.  Or anyways, I'm sure you could accomplish a lot...I don't know if I actually did or not.  I did take a three hour nap that day, but you get the point.  The rest of the nights lately haven't been much better.  Death by sleep deprivation is in the back of my mind.  Oh, and in case you're wondering why I've been up, it's 'cause we had a litter of puppies and mama had some problems with mastitis (she's getting better now, thank God!) so we were bottling puppies, as well as intensely treating mama every 20 minutes.  So yes, I've had my fill of nursing puppies lately, round the clock!  #neveradullmoment

the puppies

This is what mom and I do in between taking care of puppies.  Call the Midwife is THE BEST.  EVER.  

Since I'm sitting here and won't be getting up for a while, I'll tell you about some of my adventures lately.  I have had several driving/car-related experiences lately that should encourage you all to stay off the roads if you live within 100 miles of me.  Many of you know I'm scared to death of cops.  I got pulled over last summer, and even though I just got a warning, it severely traumatized me.  Now I have a mild panic attack whenever I see a cop, even though I am SO good, there's no reason to get pulled over.  I never text and drive, I never exceed the speed limit by more than 5 mph, I always put on my blinker, and I desperately try to stay within the lines.  Well, I was making a last minute shopping trip before Mom's birthday the other day, when I had another traumatizing experience.  I was about 10 minutes away from my destination mall, cruise control on at 57, when I spotted the cop.  He was sitting on the opposite side waiting to catch unsuspecting people like me.  I freaked, even though I knew I wasn't doing anything wrong.  As I slowed down to the upcoming 35 zone, I watched my rear view mirrors.  There was two other cars right behind me, and sure enough, Mr. Police Officer whipped out behind us.  I was dying.  My knees started knocking together and I was shaking so bad I almost just pulled over to save him the bother of putting his lights on.  He put them on, though, and the truck in front of him pulled over.  I waited for him to go around and come pull me over, but thank goodness he didn't.  He pulled up behind the truck.  Whew.  I hadn't done anything, but  I was shaking so bad I was becoming a safety hazard.  I pulled over into a friendly looking church parking lot and texted a friend, who tried to comfort me.  I sat there shaking for about 15 minutes.  Then I calmed down.  Until it struck me that there were some other cars in the parking lot.  People were probably calling the cops, reporting a suspicious person in the parking lot.  However, my friend reassured me that no, they probably could see I was a wreck and were calling an ambulance to haul me off to a mental institution.  So comforting.  I pulled out and started driving, trying to remember where I was going in the first place - it took a minute, but I did remember, and had an uneventful trip after that, except for almost going through a red light because I was still so rattled.  '_'

Mom's birthday was so fun!  I made her breakfast in bed, and then we left to go shopping in St. Cloud, about a 45 minute drive.  We had a great shopping trip at the mall and both found what we were looking for.  Then we waltzed back out to my car to go get coffee.  I unlocked my door, got in, and pushed the unlock button for mom.  Nothing happened.  I thought that was strange, and reached over to unlock her door manually.  As I was doing that, it dawned on me.  I gasped and looked at my lights.  They were on.  Mom got in and I began moaning "I'm so sorry!  I'm so sorry!"  She knew what I had done because this isn't the first time.... hardly.  I have this thing with leaving my lights on.   So....I prayed for a miracle and turned the key.  The alarm started going off.  Lovely!  It screeched for about 10 minutes, making three or four different sounds that I'd never heard before, then it finally shut off.  I asked mom for my sunglasses.  This wasn't the time to be recognized.  A guy and his wife walked up to their vehicle a couple cars down. Mom opened her door, poked her head out, and got about one syllable out before she ducked back inside and slammed the door.  "He's swearing at his wife...let's find someone else!"  We held hands and she prayed for someone to come along to help us.  We opened our eyes and saw a guy standing down at the end of our row of cars.  "There's a GUY!"  my mom screeched.   We knew we had to find a guy, because any girl as helpless as us weren't going to help the situation.  Then mom looked again.... "and he has JUMPER CABLES!"  Sure enough, he had just fallen out of the sky and was standing down there with jumper cables.  We stepped out of our car, and politely walked down to where he was.  Just kidding.  We jumped up, slammed the doors, and went running down the parking lot to snag him before he vanished.  We ran up to the two cars.  There was a friendly black dude and his girlfriend.  Mom put on her most winning smile and said "do you think you could jump us when you're done?"  The black dude motioned to a very stern looking guy who owned the other car "Oh, I left my girlfriend's lights on and he's jumping us."  "Do you think he would do us too?" my mom asked.  "I dunno," said the black dude, "I don't even know him, I just axed him and seems like a really nice guy."  {Please read that with an accent!}  Mom and I kind of exchanged glances.  We stood there for a few more minutes watching.  Mr. Good Samaritan never spoke a word and looked, umm, rather unfriendly.  We decided to try our luck elsewhere.  We asked another guy and his wife, and he pulled up across the median.  However, the jumper cables didn't reach across.  Strike three.  So we did what all wise people should do in a time of crisis: we walked over to Caribou.  I ordered a turtle mocha and decide that getting stranded by a Caribou was about the best problem that could befall me.  

We sat by the door and watched for any eligible male to come in.  I felt like a creepy stalker type person.  We gave up trying to find someone there and walked back to the car.  Then, Mom had an idea - we called mall security and this wonderful guy came and jumped us.  We got a little behind schedule, but, you know, a little adventure is always fun!

The boys and I headed to church, making our most serious, ridiculous quaker faces.

Incident #3, where Emily is an air head.  Again.

So then, last Saturday, I was heading to the cities to get together with friends.  I left early so I'd have time to get gas, and everything was going just according to plan - one of those days where I just had it all together!  Haha.  You know, before everything fell apart.  I pulled into the gas station, filled up my little beast, went inside and paid, and waltzed back out to continue my nice little trip.  I got in, turned the key, and my vehicle silently informed me that I had left the lights on, and the darn thing went dead in about 5 minutes.  I felt so. retarded.  How many times can I do this?  I went inside and told the gas station people what was wrong.  One of the workers came out and pulled his car up to jump me.  I managed to pop my hood and prop it open like an old pro - which really is impressive considering it took me about 15 minutes to figure it out at the mall incident, while my mom sat in the car and laughed at me.  But this time I got it, and just prayed that no one I knew would need gas.  The gas station guy was sooooo super nice and really tried his best, but....well, as he said, it had been a while since he had done it and we couldn't get it started.  So I told him I'd call my parents, he said I could come in for a free cup of coffee, and I resisted the urge to hug him.  My wonderful Dad came and jumped me, and then I transferred all my stuff to our Excursion, since Dad didn't think it would be a good idea to take the Pathfinder, it would probably go dead again.  So I was on my way, and my estimated arrival time was only 15 minutes late!  I cranked up the radio, slurped my coffee, and headed to the cities.  Time passed, and it got dark outside.  I began to realize that it had been a long time since I've driven the Excursion, and it was a whole lot bigger than I remembered.  I was starting to feel a little panicky....this is the first time I had driven in the cities by myself, and being in a huge, unfamiliar vehicle....well, it didn't make me feel any better.  I made it onto the freeway, and I think I stayed somewhere inside the lines of my lane.  My exit was approaching.  I moved over.  My exit came, and I kept going.  I looked down at my GPS and realized I'd missed the exit, and then I panicked.  Now my GPS was trying to re rout me, and it involved merging and more freeways, and I missed my exit again.  I finally just ignored my GPS, took the next exit, found a gas station, parked in front of the "customers only" sign, prayed I wouldn't get in trouble, and called my friends who I was going to meet.  I called Jem, no answer.  I called Joseph, no answer.  I called Andrew, no answer.  And I realized I was going to have to get out of this mess myself.  I was completely lost and had almost committed suicide by turning on a one way street, the wrong way.  I just hoped the other cars hadn't seen my blinker.  So I pep talked myself, told myself I had confidence in myself, and begged God for angels around my vehicle.  After about 15 more minutes of grueling driving and merging and craziness and praying so hard and being sure I was going to die and writing my obituary in my head (I really recommend that for stressful situations), I made it to Jem's house.  I felt like a retarded wreck, but I was there, and I was alive, and I was only really late.  I actually managed to drive home later that night in almost-blinding snow, and made it back in one piece, thank the Lord.  The good news is, we had such a blast that it was worth almost going loony!  We went to Skyzone, and it. was. awesome.  Even though I am so. not. skilled. in the area of trampolines and pretty much embarrassed myself. :P

Tim, Joseph, Jem, me, and Isabella

Now is the part where I think of some nice sentence to end this post with.  Only, remember, I got 90 minutes of sleep last night, and currently my brain is mush.  But I hope you enjoyed this post, because really, writing about all the stupid things I do is pointless.  Memories, though, memories!

Eternal Perspective

This morning I decided to try out another Kyle Idleman sermon and see if I liked it as much as I liked the one I listened to yesterday.  I randomly picked one off his website...it was the last one in a series on death.  Sounds morbid, I know.  I almost picked a different one.  But my perspective has changed now!  Here's some notes from my notes.

We tend to arrange our lives around trying to avoid and suppress the most irrefutable fact of life: death.  We don't like to talk about death.  It seems so final.  And really, I should be putting "I" instead of "we", because I've done all of the above.  However, instead of trying to not even think about death, we should be preparing for it.  Really, the reason for everything that happens in this life is preparation for the next life.  Our life is like a mist.  In the grand scheme of things, we're just a little grain of sand on the shores.  We I tend to get caught up in the moment, in the now, and forget about the goal.  Really, we I forget about what really matters.  Here's a question to use your thinker on:

Am I living with the end in mind?

The best way to know if I'm living with the end in mind would be to do a little examination.  Where does my time go?  My energy, resources, my passion?  Where is my focus?

2 Timothy 4:6-8 says:

"For I am already being poured out like a drink offering, and the time for my departure is near. 7 I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. 8 Now there is in store for me the crown of righteousness,which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will award to me on that day—and not only to me, but also to all who have longed for his appearing."

In the Old Testament, a drink offering was the least impressive, most humbling of offerings.  Paul is saying that even though he might not be the most impressive of offerings, he is pouring all of himself on the alter, a living sacrifice.  And here's the statement that slapped me in the face.  We are all pouring ourselves onto some kind of alter, we are all giving ourselves to something.  So the question isn't whether or not we are pouring our lives out, it's what or who are we pouring our lives out to? 

Right there.  Talk about conviction.  And then, to really drive this point home, Mr. Idleman brought up funerals.  He told the audience to close their eyes, and imagine this: imagine you have died and the pastor who is going to do your funeral is talking to three or four of your closest friends and family members.  He asks them, "What was she/he passionate about?  We did she/he love?  What's one thing you remember about her/him?"  Try and imagine what each person would say.  What do you want to be remembered for, what will people say about you when you're gone?  Will it be how much you loved sports?  The hobbies you enjoyed?  Your sense of humor?  None of these things are bad, but what do you want to be known by?  I told you this was convicting!  :P

Back to 2 Timothy 4:6-8.  Paul says "The time has come for my departure".  That word "departure" means "set sail."  I absolutely LOVED that meaning.  Paul uses a word that is synonomous with "beginning!"  He doesn't use an "ending" word.  Pretty cool, huh?!?!  Paul considers death as a departure, a new beginning in a new place.  He's not dreading death, he's anticipating setting sail to a new adventure in a better place.  Morbid?!?  I think not.  :D

Philippians 1:21-24  "For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain. 22 If I am to go on living in the body, this will mean fruitful labor for me. Yet what shall I choose? I do not know! 23 I am torn between the two: I desire to depart and be with Christ,which is better by far; 24 but it is more necessary for you that I remain in the body."

Basically, Paul is saying, "If it were up to me, I'd set sail now, but I'm glad to be on earth serving." Pretty neat perspective!

So, what does it mean to live with the end in mind?  It means living with a ever-increasing desire to be in our heavenly home.  It's so easy to  get consummed with the now.  I know that I tend to give all my time and energy to the mist, and my focus gets stuck on earthly things.  But those things aren't eternal, and they don't last.  

2 Corinthians 4:16-18:  "Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. 17 For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. 18 So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.

Ok, we can all agree that Paul went through some rough stuff.  Beatings?  Imprisonment? Stoning?  Yet he calls it "light and momentary troubles" in view of the eternal reward.  Mr. Idleman quoted Peter Kreeft: "In light of heaven, to fear the worst earthly loss would be like a millionaire fearing the loss of a penny--less, a scratch on a penny."  Mind boggling, no?  Stressing out about life here is like a millionaire freaking out over a scratched penny.  

Mr. Idleman gave an awesome illustration that I'm not gonna do justice to, but I'll try.  This is like two guys who are paid to do the same job for a year.  They have to stand outside and hold a sign for a new business, 40 hours a week, no matter what weather, and will be paid in a lump sum at the end of the year.  One of the guys will be paid 18 thousand, and the other, 18 million.  Will you be able to tell who is who?  Oh yeah!  The one guy is gonna be bored, frusterated, maybe feeling bitter, and ready to quit.  Why?  Because of what he believes is going to happen at the end.  The other guy?  He's singing, break dancing, throwing that sign up in the air, doing the moonwalk.  Why?  Because of what he believes is going to happen at the end.  Same life situation, same circumstances, different responses.  Why?  Because what they believe will happen at the end changes how they respond going through it.  If we really, truly believe we are going to heaven, it changes the way we hold the sign.  It's never too late to change, but change needs to start now.  It really comes down to what we really, really, really believe.  Do we really believe this stuff?  If we do, it will show.  Our lives will reflect it.  Our life will be aligned with those heartfelt beliefs.  This is about living intentionally.  Am I serving people or living for myself?  Am I storing up treasures in heaven?  Do I forgive people who don't deserve it, or do I harbor bitterness?  Am I praying for people who don't know Jesus, and sharing His love and grace with them?  If I truly believe in hell, I will be.  Is my life marked by joy, hope, and peace?  If I truly believe in heaven, it will be.  Do people see that joy, hope, and peace in how I handle struggles and challenges?  

So, my challenge to myself: am I living with the end in mind, an eternal perspective, living intentionally?  Thinking about that should change how I live every day.  Today, it was a little thing, giving a tract to the lady at the gas station.  Praying for a person who caught my eye at the stoplight.  Baby steps for me, it's a big journey, but I'm purposing to live more intentionally.  After all, it just plain makes sense to invest in the eternal, 'cause it's the only thing that lasts. 

Grace

I watched this video this morning for my quiet time.  I have to say, this is hands down the best message I think I've ever heard.  It was one of those messages that just resonates with you, and it's a mix of goose bumps, tears, and shouting "YES!"  Take 30 minutes and watch it.  Good stuff.

Here's my sketchy summary.  Most of this is paraphrasing what he said from notes I jotted down, and it's not super well organized...but I don't have three hours to perfect this, so here y'are.  =)

Hebrews 12:15, NIV says "See to it that no one misses the grace of God..."

As Mr. Idleman put it, (I'm paraphrasing) "When grace is removed or replaced, things become toxic."
Romans 3:23 says "For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God."  All means all, and that's all all means.  We've all sinned, period.  Sure, it's easy to compare.  "Oh, I'm so much better than so-and-so."  Bad news is, though, when we do that, we're sinning. :P  Yup, we're in deep yogurt.
So the diagnosis is, we have sin.  The prognosis is, "the wages of sin is death."  But here's the good news: there's an antidote!  It's called GRACE.  Romans 5:15 says: "But the gift is not like the trespass. For if the many died by the trespass of the one man, how much more did God's grace and the gift that came by the grace of the one man, Jesus Christ, overflow to the many!"  Sin is great, but God's grace is greater.  This is how it looks:

Grace > sin, regrets, secrets, etc.

Grace is greater than.

Romans 5:16-18: "Again, the gift of God is not like the result of the one man's sin: The judgment followed one sin and brought condemnation, but the gift followed many trespasses and brought justification. 17 For if, by the trespass of the one man, death reigned through that one man, how much more will those who receive God's abundant provision of grace and of the gift of righteousness reign in lifethrough the one man, Jesus Christ. 18 Consequently, just as the result of one trespass was condemnation for all men, so also the result of one act of righteousness was justification that brings life for all men." God's grace makes us right with Him.  God's grace gives us a second chance. God's grace gives us a relationship with him.  

Talking about God and leaving out grace is called religion.  Mr. Idleman put it brilliantly: "Religion is what we are left with when we take grace out of the equation."  And religion?  It's not greater than my sin.  It won't save me.  Religion is man's attempt to earn God's favor by adhering to rules and regulations.  Religion says "I can be good enough to balance out the scales." 

Religion vs. Grace

Keyword - Religion: DO  Grace: DONE

Religion is about what we can do, Grace is about what He has done.

Focus - Religion: OUTWARD  Grace: INWARD

Jesus said of the "religious" people, "These people honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me."  Grace focuses inward, focuses on the heart.

Foundation - Religion: RULES  Grace: RELATIONSHIP

Religion imposes rules that are man-made...aka, legalism.  Grace says our relationship with God isn't up in the air every time we make a mistake.  

Motivation - Religion: SHAME  Grace: GRATITUDE

Religion motivates by making you feel guilty, we are motivated through grace because of our gratitude for what Jesus did, this motivates our holiness.

Feeling - Religion: FEAR/FRUSTRATION  Grace: FREEDOM

Religion causes us to feel condemnation, trying to be good enough but never measuring up.  Grace gives a very freeing freedom, we are free from the pressure to measure up, this was already taken care of on the cross.  As if we could do anything in our own strength to measure up to perfection.  Of course we are growing in Christ and our goal is to live like Him, but we can't earn anything through our works.

Outcome - Religion: PRIDE or GUILT  Grace: LOVE

The outcome of religion is either pride or guilt.  "Look at what I've done" or "I can't do enough".  However when our focus is on God's grace, the outcome and outpouring is love.

RELIGION < GRACE

Mr. Idleman also pointed out that grace is not understood by explanation as much as experience.  The power of grace has to be experienced, which is why the gospels are full of stories of God's grace.  

Mr. Idleman told the story of the adulterous woman.  She was caught in the act of adultery, dragged before Jesus.  It was the worst day of her life, her deepest secrets were shoved into the light.  "But the worst day of her life became the best day of her life, because in her brokeness, she meets Jesus." 

GRACE > SECRETS

GRACE > SHAME

Oftentimes, we receive grace, but we don't live in it, in the freedom and joy that it brings.  Our sins are removed as far as the East is from the West.  Jesus has set us free, not only from sin, but from the guilt of sin.  The whole gospel is about Jesus making things new.  It's called grace.

Awkward + Awesome

So I've seen these "Awkward + Awesome" posts on blogs before, and they are my FAVORITE.  So much fun to read and I've been wanting to do them on my blog, so here goes!

Awesome:

The new group of friends I've been getting to know!  I graduated with them, yes, but we've been hanging out lately and it's been a blast to get to know them more!  Finding people that have the same love for Jesus and goals in life as you is pretty awesome.

Seeing friends in love.  It's the sweetest thing!

My puppy.  That girl and I have a bond, and it's a blast.  Dogs are so smart!  Especially mine. ;)

Our family getting together with other families a few times a week to play hockey.  We spend a lot of time laughing, it's a blast!

Friends who randomly text you Bible verses, and it's just what you need at that moment.

Starting guitar lessons with my dad!!!

Coffee.  This will be in every awesome post I ever do.  I will love coffee til the day I die.  And my new favorite?  Starbuck's Salted Carmel Mocha.  #heavenonearth

Having my quiet time early in the morning when everything is still.  The best part of my day, it's amazing how much scripture is real and alive to me now.

My little stick shift Pathfinder.  I LOVE THAT VEHICLE.  It's so much fun to drive, sometimes I take the scenic/longer route home just because.  Although, buying my own gas?  Not as fun.  The first time I stood at the pump and watched those numbers multiply (I swear they were multiplying, not adding), I almost had a heart attack.  Now I just go sit in my car, resigned to my fate of broke.

My piano teacher.  She's not just my teacher, she has been a mentor and friend and so encouraging to me!  Someday I hope to be that kind of a teacher!

Exciting plans for the future that are in the works!  Not letting the cat out of the bag 'til things are for sure, but I'M STOKED!

Music.  I love my music!  This song has been on repeat a lot lately.

eShakti.  They just had a big sale/first time customer deal and I got the cutest dress for $12!  I felt like I was stealing.  :D   Gotta love awesome deals!

This verse:  "For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord."

Awkward:

So I had just met this guy, like in the last 5 minutes.  And this conversation happens:

Guy: "What's your name again?"
Me: "Emily"
Guy: "What's your last name?"
Me: "Housman"
 <he grins>
Guy: "That's my way of finding out your first and last name without being creepy!"
Me:  "Umm...ok?!"
 <about two minutes later>
Guy: "What's your last name again?"
Me: "Housman"
Guy: repeats, "Housman.....nah, I don't really like that name..."
 <dramatic pause>
  "....but I could change it!"
Me:  It took a moment to sink in.  Then I just kind of stared and was like "did you really just say what I think you did?"  Then mumbled something about that being a first.  AWKWARD.  LIKE, REALLY AWKWARD.  Funny thing is, we're friends now.  Apparently dropping pick up lines on people you've just met is a good way to make friends?!

Missing my turn about five times, and every time my gps redirects me, missing the redirect turns.  :P  My one consolation is, I was trying to get to Starbucks, so I can blame it on the fact that I was coffee deprived.

My purse. It's so awkward. I CAN NEVER FIND ANYTHING IN IT. I dig and dig and I have so much stuff in there but can never find what I need!

Losing my keys while at a friend's house and ending up dumping said purse's entire contents on the floor to try and find them. It's just awkward to dump your purse out in front of people. "This is my deodorant. This is my pepper spray. This is my dagger. Yes, I'm armed and dangerous."  And no, my keys weren't in there. 

Crashing into a guy during a game of hockey....really hard.  It's just awkward.  And my jaw is sore. :P

Checking out and using my credit card for the first time, sliding it the wrong way.

Pulling up to a gas station and forgetting which side my tank is on.  Open my door, stick my head out to check, and notice employee watching out the window.  I just grinned at her.  Yes, I have some blonde strands in my mop.

Stomach growling during church.  :P Apparently a cup of coffee before we left wasn't enough.  

Walking in heels.  I got a pair of boots and they have the most heel I've ever had, and it isn't even that much...but every once in a while I have this little lose-my-balance-dance I do.  I'm a barefoot or flip flops girl.  But...I live in Minnesota so that doesn't work well this time of year.  (I've tried).

When I "meet" someone, and they look so familiar, but I can't remember who they are.

Sitting at an intersection with my music turned way up, howling singing along, and notice that it looks like everyone else sitting there is watching me.  And no one is smiling.  Come on people!  This is fun!  Sing along or something!  :P  *tucks tail between legs and crawls away*

Having a bad day, go to piano lessons, teacher asks me how I'm doing, and I start crying.  Really....awkward. 

Telling my dad, "I have a confession to make..."...and he immediately interjects, "what did you break?" '_'  That doesn't speak well of my reputation around here.  ={

Texting a guy and hitting the wrong emoji.  A heart.  It was supposed to be a smiley face. '_'  Then explaining that to him.

Learning how to use Snapchat and accidentally sending pictures you didn't meant to to a friend.  OOPS.

Accidentally texting recordings of yourself to people.  Thanks a lot for the new update, Apple.  You may or may not have ruined my life.


So there you go.  Awesome and Awkward moments from my life lately.  More posts like this or did it bore you to tears?

Happy Sunday!

1 John 1:7 KJV

But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship one with another, and the blood of Jesus Christ his Son cleanseth us from all sin.

1 John 2:8 KJV

Again, a new commandment I write unto you, which thing is true in him and in you: because the darkness is past, and the true light now shineth.